Travel
First time in Belize; This Finna be a breeze. (Pt 1)
Feb
When I was in 7th grade, Señor Shields, my Spanish teacher who was great at his job, taught us a song to learn all of the capitals of the Spanish speaking countries in Latin America. (Another funny story happened in that same class).
I can still quote em:
“Mexico DF (De Efe) , Mexico, Guatemala, Guatemala, Tegucigalpa, Honduras, San Salvador, El Salvador, Managua Nicaragua, San Jose, Costa Rica, Panama, Panama, La Havana, Cuba, Santo Domingo, Republica Dominicana…” – You get the idea.
Point being, the countries conspicuously missing are Haiti, Guyana, and Belize (+Suriname). See also: the black ones.
Before I went, I thought it was a country with people that looked “like Mexicans” and hoped for some folks that resembled Afro-Latinas. Turns out it’s an extremely diverse place.
Quick Fax about Belize:
- Belize is about 8800 Sq Miles – about the size of Massachusetts (Fvck Harvard).
- About 360k people, so 15km per person
- Capital of the Mayan Empire long before the colonizers (British for around 200 years) w/ about 900 sites
- Second Largest Barrier Reef in the World (behind Australia); Only Jaguar Preserve in the World.
- Official Language is English (80% speak it), also speak Spanish, Mayan, Creole (Kriol), and Garifuna.
So, anyway, it was my ole lady’s 30th, so we decided to shoot down there. Made a couple of rookie travel mistakes: forgot my charger, and didn’t have cash. B Ware did that so hopefully you’n have to go through that.
We go through Atlanta (3hr flight from San Diego, and 3 hour flight from Belize). We get to customs and see some unruly Europeans from TX, 30 year olds acting like they are on Spring Break. I’m not amused.(Why they gotta be from TX, smh?)
We rent a car after Billy looked out for us and gave us two dollars to get out of the airport (see no cash above), and then start the two to three hour drive from Belize City (the capital) to Hopkins.
About a hour in, we stop at Cheer’s (yeah – just like the show, NORM!!!). It’s cool, and they have animals and a cool view out over land. Our waitress was cute and “looked like a Mexican”. But what threw me off was she was thick, had slugs (two golds inside the fangs for the hood lingo challenged), and talked like a person from the Caribbean.
So we dip, and it’s another hour or so until we get to the resort towards about 5pm. The resort is super cool. The food is cool, and we call it a night.
So we get dinner that night at the resort restaurants, and lo and behold, another Texan (from Coolidge) showing her ass on the Karaoke. I vent on my insta story.
